I usually don't post a lot on things like Machinima, but this one is kind of incredible.
What would happen if you took 44 minutes of audio from 28 Weeks Later and painstakingly animated every scene (sometimes even matching the camera angles used in the actual film) using the videogame Halo 3?
OK, so we all know I'm a huge sucker for zombie flicks. I love them! They're now pretty much my fave monster movies. Sometimes scary, sometimes funny, sometimes intentionally funny, often gross, the premise is just so ridiculous it's hard not to have fun with them.
I got all inspired by a story on zombie origins written up over at IO9, that I felt like watching a zombie movie. I've had a copy of German film Zombie '90: Extreme Pestilence, largely known as one of the worst movies ever made zombie or otherwise, kicking around for a while, so I figured now was as good a time as any other.
It's bad. Really bad. It's literally two guys driving around killing zombies, and zombies eating humans. That's about it. English speaking audiences get a rare treat though. The English dub is SO AWFUL it's actually really funny. The casting is bad (big ole black dude voice for skinny white German scientist, WTF?), the recording is bad (mic pops, breathing and mouth noises, no effort to blend sounds, I think it's in mono now that I think about it), and at some point they just give up and let the voice actors come up with witty lines REGARDLESS IF ANY CHARACTERS ON SCREEN ARE SPEAKING!
Across the board this movie is so horrendous ... you might actually enjoy it, if you're into that Mystery Science Theater 3000 kinda thing...
I posted almost exactly the same thing when the Gap was making a deceased Audrey Hepburn dance for skinny pants. This is the scariest Zombie Movie EVER MADE! Take THAT 28 Days Later! But seriously, if you have any humanity or decency, how can one watch that without vomiting in their mouths just a little bit.
It is kinda funny that zombie Orville uses a Creative Zen mp3 player, and not an iPod. Heh-heh, wont those stupid zombies ever learn...
I posted almost exactly the same thing when the Gap was making a deceased Audrey Hepburn dance for skinny pants. This is the scariest Zombie Movie EVER MADE!Take THAT 28 Days Later! But seriously, if you have any humanity or decency, how can one watch that without vomiting in their mouths just a little bit.It is kinda funny that zombie Orville uses a Creative Zen mp3 player, and not an iPod. Heh-heh, wont those stupid zombies ever learn......Stupid zombies...
Because it's the holidays, and we all become retail zombies....yeah... see how easy I made that jump. Now, again, TotW isn't a "best of" or "top 5" or any of that, so all you people (all 6.2 of you) that read this and don't post comments, don't go posting comments that you wouldn't have posted anyway, because I might've missed your favorite zombie flick or something. It's making ONE story arc out of FIVE movies (watching one a night Mon-Fri). With that said, here's the run down:
1. The Horror Begins! Every good Zombie story arc needs the "origin" story, and 28 Days Later works great for that. While technically not "zombies" per se, there is no ambiguity as to where they come from. Have fun watching London collapse. For bonus points (and better continuity) use one of the alternate endings where they don't get rescued at the end.
2. The Horror Spreads! So London's pretty much fucked ... yeah, but what about the rest of the world? What if the goop that they used on the Monkeys from 28 Days Later could be stored in soda bottles, and transported to Hong Kong only to be opened by some video game geeks, to start a whole new epidemic? Bio Zombie does a great job of answering both of those questions...if you can handle subtitles... Bonus points for Romero style mall action goodness!
3. The Horror Keeps Spreading! So the one unanswered question from BioZombie is, what would happen if the zombie plague spread from a mall in Hong Kong to a suburban Pittsburgh mall? A tricky question indeed, but expertly answered by DAWN OF THE DEAD. I'm partial to the original, but really in this zombie timeline of death, undeath, and mayhem the remake will work as well.
4. The Horror Spreads Back! Just for shits, and to break up all of the darkness from the last three, we peak back in on England in Shaun of the Dead. Uh-oh looks like the "zed word" things are back and zanier than ever! Mix in a little light romantic comedy, sprinkle with some extremely tense moments, and bake at 375* for about 99 minutes. Beautiful. Quite possibly one of the best Satires ever filmed...ever...
5. The Horror Wont Stop Spreading! So after peaking back in on England, we find out that the Zombies have won. The world is over run, and what few survivors are left, exist in a very feudal existance. I get bonus points for Land of the Dead, as there isn't a big origin's story, we just take it for granted that the zombies are winning, so it fits into the timeline perfectly, and it also caps well, since the last three movies rhyme sorta. However I lose points, as this is not Romero's strongest work (the main characters dont die, wtf?!?), the ending is a little weak with the "and life/unlife goes on" bit, and it's another Romero film in the 5, so not very original on my part. Zombie Leguizamo is kinda neat though...
So that wraps the week. If you're not fully satisfied with Zombies and Humans living together, or if you feel that the greater social ramifications of living with the undead still haven't been answered, then you can check out Cemetary Man as an honorary Number 6. Should work pretty well for all those nagging inter personal undead questions one might have, and a pinch of necrophelia to boot...
